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25 Blistering Food Takes to Set the Internet on Fire

Prepare to defend your strongly-held food beliefs on Twitter

Pizza: honestly not that great.
Getty Images/Shannon O’Hara

Although food opinion pieces have always been part of a healthy media diet, hot takes about dining and drinking have dominated the culinary conversation so far in 2019, from “The Aperol Spritz Is Not a Good Drink” to “Don’t Let Naysayers Ruin Dining Out on Valentine’s Day.” These strongly voiced opinions keep writers and food enthusiasts arguing about frivolous nonsense for days and sometimes weeks on end, and the trend shows no sign of slowing down anytime soon. For anyone who wants to light up the internet with a spicy rant, here are 25 fresh headline ideas that are sure to get everyone arguing on Twitter:

1) Brunch Is the Best Meal, Actually
2) Ask for Ice in Your Water and I Will Ask You to Leave My Restaurant, by Tom Colicchio
3) Why I Only Tip the Chef Directly
4) French Onion Is the Horniest Soup
5) Chef Boyardee Is a Cop
6) The Best Cheeseburger Has Cheese Outside the Buns
7) Quiche Is Actually a Sandwich If You Really Think About It
8) Detroit-Style Chicken Teriyaki Is the Only Good Teriyaki
9) Replace Your Tacos with Salad, They’re Practically the Same
10) Why Stew Shouldn’t Be Served Hot
11) The Orange Slice Is the Best Part of the Diner Omelet
12) Lasagna Is a Book You Can’t Read
13) Please, for the Love of God, Don’t Mix Your Iced Tea With Lemonade
14) Buttering Bread Is B-A-S-I-C
15) Canapés Should Be Full Sandwiches
16) Fro-Yo Is the One True Thanksgiving Food
17) Why Dave & Busters Should Nix the Arcade Games
18) Newsflash: Spaghetti Is Cancelled
19) Curly Fries Could Be Curlier TBH
20) Forks Are for Nerds
21) Nobody Actually Likes Margaritas
22) Pizza? No Thanks!
23) Save the Rainforest (Cafe)
24) Put Ketchup in Your Potato Salad
25) Tapas Are Too Big

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