Taco Bell’s Fire Sauce May Have Saved the Lives of a Man and His Dog

“Taco Bell fire sauce saves lives,” says Oregon man

An Oregon man trapped on an isolated road by a snowstorm told authorities that he survived his five-day ordeal with the help of those tiny Taco Bell fire sauce packets. Jeremy Taylor became stuck on a forest service road, with his dog Ally, a week ago on Sunday, when he fell asleep, and woke up to find too much snow to move his car or walk out. On Thursday, after a snowmobiler rescued him, Taylor told the Deschutes County Sheriff’s Office that he had sustained himself with “a few taco sauce packets he had.” No word on whether he shared with his dog, or whether he suffered nasty heartburn from all that mass-produced acid on an empty stomach.

And in other news...

• Despite many chains getting into the salad game, a new study from Boston University shows that fast food meals have become much more calorie-loaded since the ‘80s (even though portion sizes only increased slightly). It makes sense when you consider that recent years have given the world foodstuffs like the Double Down sandwich and “Mac ‘n Cheetos”. [NYTimes]
• Following its first annual decline in sales in almost ten years, Papa John’s is trying to improve its internal culture with programs like diversity training. Who would’ve thought that there might be a cultural problem in a company (formerly) led by a man who tried to cover up racism with more racism? [WSJ]
• Measuring cup magnates Corelle Brands (known for the Pyrex line of kitchenware) are merging with the makers of the Instant Pot, creating a company worth around $2 billion. [WSJ]
• A British mom is Mad As Hell And Not Gonna Take It™ after paying £4.25 for a kids’ meal with three chicken nuggets and seven fries. [The Sun]
• Apparently In-N-Out Burger creates true love: on Sunday’s premiere of American Idol judge and wearer of cupcake bras Katy Perry revealed that she met Orlando Bloom after he stole burgers she had ordered to the Golden Globes. [ET Canada]
• Chinese Starbucks customers got into some scuffles over cutesy, limited-edition plastic cat paw mugs. Embarrassing, until you consider that they are actually somewhat cool-looking when you fill ‘em up. [CNN]
• Cardi B and Bruno Mars glam up a Los Angeles Mexican diner in a new video that’s basically a celebration of late-night tacos. [GQ]
• Crack open and suck up this cool narrated history of the famed John Mulaney Diner Lobster sketch on Saturday Night Live. [Vulture]

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