Burger King Might Buy Popeyes in a Greasy Fast-Food Merger

Two fast-food superpowers could be on the brink of becoming one: The company that owns Burger King is reportedly in talks to buy beloved fried chicken chain Popeyes, according to Reuters.

BK parent company Restaurant Brands International also owns Tim Hortons, the coffee shop chain that’s wildly popular in Canada and the Northeastern U.S. (and occasionally serves drive-thru customers on dog sleds). If RBI and Popeyes were indeed to merge, it could potentially mean major expansion for the latter. While Burger King has more than 15,000 locations worldwide, Popeyes only has around 2,000. Neither company has commented on the merger talks, leaving us with no choice but to speculate wildly.

As Buzzfeed News points out, such a merger “would create a diverse, international fast-food company, similar to Yum Brands, which owns Pizza Hut, KFC, and Taco Bell.” That particular greasy triumvirate has given the world the strange beast colloquially known as a “Kentacohut” — stores that serve menu items from all three chains. Could combined Burger King/Popeyes outlets be on the horizon?

But more importantly for fast-food aficionados, given BK’s penchant for weird menu items like the Whopper burrito and Cheetos chicken fries, not to mention Burger King wine and Whopper-scented cologne, such a marriage could lead to some truly terrifying-slash-beautiful fast-food novelties.

Just think of the possibilities:

• A KFC Double Down-style sandwich featuring Whopper patties as the “bun” sandwiching a fried chicken middle (or vice-versa).

• Two words: biscuit burgers.

• Spicy fried chicken Croissan’wiches for breakfast. (Please?)

• Weird combo meals galore: Think a Whopper Jr. paired with a fried chicken leg, red beans and rice, and fries.

• Popeyes air fresheners. Who wouldn’t want their vehicle to reek of fried chicken and those glorious biscuits, 24 hours a day?

More realistically, being acquired by the much larger RBI could help improve Popeyes’ notoriously poor customer service. Let’s just pray they don’t ruin the food, which has long been a bright spot of depressing airport food courts.

• Burger King and Tim Hortons Owner in Talks to Buy Popeyes [Reuters]
• More Mergers & Acquisitions Coverage [E]