Other than his annoying catchphrases ("I'd eat that off a flip-flop!"), the most distinctive thing about Guy Fieri is undoubtedly his hair. But what if his signature bleached blonde spikes never happened? What if the Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives host was just a regular American dad?
A Reddit user named LegitLemur dared to dream that very dream, taking to Photoshop to strip Fieri of his signature hairdo, as well as the matching facial hair, hoop earrings, and super-kewl chef coat. The end result: Gus Ferry, a friendly if rather generic-looking dude who could be your next-door neighbor.
Guy Fieri wears chunky silver skull bracelets; the only accessory Gus Ferry wears is a Livestrong bracelet he's had since 2004.
Guy Fieri wears baggy black cargo shorts; Gus Ferry wears khaki Dockers.
Guy Fieri wears silky flame-print buttondowns; Gus Ferry wears polos embroidered with the logo of the insurance company where he's worked for the past 14 years.
Guy Fieri puts Donkey Sauce on everything; Gus Ferry's favorite condiment is Hunt's ketchup.
• Got Bored and Decided to Un-Douche Guy Fieri With Photoshop [Reddit]
• Guy Fieri Likes His Hair the Way It Is [E]
• All Guy Fieri Coverage [E]