Ever wish you could send someone an eggplant emoji in real life? According to The Daily Dot, now you can. For a mere $9.99, Eggplantmail.com will send an anonymous package to the person of your choice containing an actual eggplant. It can be sent as a thoughtful, albeit slightly creepy romantic gesture or perhaps as a cruel joke to a sworn enemy — just don't substitute it for a Valentine's Day or birthday gift for a significant other, lest you find yourself on the receiving end of a breakup text containing several middle-finger emojis.
Because sending just an eggplant would be super weird, obviously, Eggplantmail.com will also write a custom message on the eggplant to spruce things up a bit. Just don't send one to your grandmother with a note about how legendary her eggplant parm is, because everyone knows the eggplant emoji has nothing to do with food and everything to do with sexting. This new mail-order venture could be a hit in states like New York and Louisiana where the eggplant emoji is most popular.