December hits and the candy canes come out to celebrate the holiday season. But, long gone are the days of simple peppermint canes. We’ve entered a reality where the sky is the limit in terms of flavors, but the jury’s still out on whether the world is better off for this wealth of options, ranging from chocolate to pickle. There are even candy canes made to taste like other candies, for those moments when just indulging in the original canes is not enough.
One Seattle-based company, Archie McPhee, at least owns up to its products in its company slogan: “We make weird.” Its flavors run the gamut of foods that should never be in cane form (like gravy) to the “fire-and-brimstone-flavored” Krampus candy canes.
For those traditionalists who believe minty candy canes are the only way to go, maybe shield yourself from this list of flavors no reasonable person should be forced to eat.
Nothing says “dessert” better than a treat flavored like a meat sauce, right?
Then there are the Dr. Pepper-flavored candy canes, for when you would rather eat a beverage than drink one.
Why not just eat an actual pickle? It’s less likely to cause cavities.
Sure, people love bacon, but enough to invest substantial time consuming it in candy form?
Although the chocolate mint flavor is the least offensive of the bunch, candied chocolate is still wholly unappealing.
Beyond these five, other runner-up flavors we’d rather stay away from include Welch’s fruity candy canes and a Brach’s Red Hots version. If you do decide to go for the red hots, make sure to keep them separate from the standard red-and-white mint canes to avoid any nasty surprises.
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