Joffee Is the Coffee-Juice Hybrid No One Asked For

Move over, Cronut™, there's yet another new food portmanteau in town: joffee. Joffee is shorthand for coffee juice, a product recently unveiled by an Austin, Texas-based company called (what else) Coffee Juice. As The Telegraph explains, Joffee is cold-brew coffee "mixed with juiced whole blueberries and cane sugar," bottled and served cold. That's right, now you can save precious minutes that could instead be spent gazing into your mobile device by gulping your morning juice and coffee down simultaneously.

The strange-sounding beverage was concocted by Brett Holmes and Strother Simpson, two guys who are well-versed in the coffee industry: "We're the guys who developed and advanced the Toddy® commercial brewing process and helped spark the cold brewed coffee revolution," the duo write on the Coffee Juice website. The new drink is meant to have wider appeal, and is being marketed to both coffee fiends and those who don't usually drink it.

They tout their new product as "All natural, non-carbonated, non-dairy, non-GMO" (what, no mention of gluten?), and loaded with antioxidants and probiotics. Thanks to the blueberries, it is rather high in sugar — 19 grams per eight-ounce serving, compared to zero in plain old coffee — although the website points out that's still about 25 percent less sugar than Red Bull or soda. They're also planning to launch a low-calorie version sweetened with stevia; for now, it comes in original, salted caramel, vanilla, and coconut varieties. It can currently be found in grocery and convenience stores throughout Texas as well as in Vancouver, B.C.

Although millions — if not billions — of people worldwide apparently find regular old coffee satisfying enough to start their day with, that hasn't stopped people from trying to improve upon the caffeinated elixir: Recent developments in the coffee sphere include coffee infused with resveratrol — the same antioxidant found in red wine — and K-cup style pods spiked with cannabis. Nestle is working on developing a sort of extended-release coffee that would keep drinkers caffeine-boosted all day long, and a new flour made from green coffee beans could be used to produce baked goods packed with both antioxidants and caffeine.