How to Use Your Brand New iReplicator

Table Of Contents (all h2's added automatically)

IMPORTANT SAFEGUARDS

When using any advanced machinery, basic safety precautions should always be followed, including these.

1. READ ALL INSTRUCTIONS
2. To avoid injury, keep face, hands, and other body parts out of food materialization chamber while replicating is in process.
3. Do not use if system maintenance text appears on screen. Immediately sync with the HELP DESK. (Click link here to connect immediately, or touch the help desk icon. Help desk icon will remain on screen throughout all replicator processes, even system maintenance.)
4. Close supervision is necessary when any networked machinery is used by or near children.
5. Childproofing is recommended if replicator will be near children. This will restrict when the replicator can be used by voice-recognized children, and what foods can be prepared for them.
6. Do not retrieve items from the food materialization chamber until the screen displays the finished icon and text and the safety lock field has cleared.
7. Do not operate if any part of the replicator has been damaged.
8. Drinking alcohol may cause poisoning, addiction, and birth defects.
9. Consuming highly-processed foods may cause poisoning, addiction, and other health problems.
10. Replicator use is not recommended for anyone with a history of alcohol or food addiction.
11. This replicator has been authorized for household use only. Use it only for food preparation as described.
12. Do not attempt to defeat the safety lock field on the food materialization chamber.
13. System Diagnostic and Repair Sessions will occur monthly and take approximately seven minutes. Do not use replicator during System Diagnostic and Repair Sessions.

DO NOT ATTEMPT TO DELETE THESE INSTRUCTIONS.

THESE INSTRUCTIONS ARE ALWAYS ACCESSIBLE VIA VOICE ACTIVATION ("SAFEGUARDS") AND VIA SETTINGS>SAFEGUARDS

getting started

Congratulations, you're now the proud owner of the world's first iReplicator, which represents the ultimate in at-home food-particle-regeneration technology. An early word of advisement: Human transition into an all-replicated or partial-replicated diet may come with complications, including an initial incompatibility with your digestive tract. Consult a physician if these symptoms persist for more than seven days, or if you believe you are not well-suited to a replicated diet. Your physician may be able to provide additional guidance and appropriate meal plans; also see the Choice Settings section below.

1) The iReplicator is designed to be out-of-the-box ready for use: Simply plug in the energy station (piece A), which contains the replicator mainframe and touchpad controls, to your home's solar core. Ensure the replication chamber (piece B) lies on a flat, stable surface ideally located 16-18 inches below the energy station. Once plugged into the solar core, the energy station will automatically sync with the chamber below, and a light on its touchpad will flash green when initial calibrations are complete.
**Is the device not working? Consult our troubleshooting section below.

2) The iReplicator is pre-programmed with introductory recipes, spanning cultures and cuisines. To create a dish, simply place a receptacle of your choice in the replication chamber (**Note: the iReplicator will not replicate plates, mugs, or any other food container), and browse the full list of available dishes via voice command ("LIST OF RECIPES"). Due to the enormity of the network, it's recommended you simply search for the recipe you want via the SEARCH function (both voice and icon activation will work for search).

Based on usership, here are some of the most popular replicator orders in your area:

Macaroni and Cheese with Crispy Herb Topping
Sea Greens and Jellyfish Salad with Ginger-Sesame Dressing
Sweet and Spicy Fried Brown Rice With Crickets and Pineapple
Cheese and Cured Meat "Picnic Platter" with Jams, Nuts, and Breads
Avocado Toast

Once you have confirmed the food of your choice, verbally command (or the hit the button marked) "ENERGIZE" when prompted. The system's safety lock field will materialize in the chamber to ensure a safe replication occurs. The item of your choice will replicate inside the provided food vessel in under three seconds, and will be ready for retrieval when the touchpad visually and/or verbally designates that it's "FINISHED." DO NOT reach into the chamber before being prompted; consult the Important Safeguards section for more information.

** Not seeing a food that you'd like to replicate? Consider options add-ons and apps by visiting the Available Accessories section below.

3) While the iReplicator provides top-of-the-line technology in its seemingly limitless menu options, it does require some pre-replication menu planning. As you browse through the provided list of recipes, you'll note that each recipe is for one complete dish (i.e., Whole Chicken Roasted with Rosemary), and all other components (Fauxmato Panzanella Salad; Brussels Sprouts With Soylent Glaze) must be replicated separately to create a multi-dish meal. (Verbally commanding "Chicken Breast with a side of Fauxmato Salad" will result in an error message.) Note the iReplicator only replicates one complete dish at a time.

** Because the iReplicator replicates recipes to-the-letter as they were written, there is no additional prompt for recipe ingredients omissions or "desired level of doneness." Please plan your recipe selections accordingly.

** Because dishes arrive "complete" and as-written, be prepared to provide your own, physical utensils to carve and serve into appropriate portion sizes.

5) Although the iReplicator calibrates its dishes to fit the provided food receptacle placed in the chamber, spillage does happen. In that event, the replicator chamber can be cleaned with a warm, wet cloth. DO NOT place the replicator chamber in a dishwasher or an air-cleansing blast device.

AVAILABLE ACCESSORIES

There are plenty of accessories and apps available for free and for purchase in the accessories store. You can access the store via voice command or via the store icon on the homescreen. Below are some recommended accessories to maximize your replicator's efficiency and capabilities.

Camera Bundle Enhancement
Take the food media you share through your replicator to the next level with the camera bundle. Available enhancements include: diffuser app to create softer light within the food materialization chamber; upgraded camera lenses; backgrounds app that mimics various surfaces like marble and wood; and a stylist app, an interactive tool to help you make the most beautiful moving and still images you can.

From Our Kitchen to Yours Network Enhancement
Bring the fun of a restaurant dinner to your home with our first-ever restaurant recipe app. The app adds recipes from restaurants around the world to your replicator network. New recipes added daily.

Around the World Network Enhancement *Free
The Around the World network enhancement adds thousands of recipes from across the world to the replicator network. Around the World focuses on cuisines that are underrepresented in the network, including recipes from the cultures of Sub-Saharan Africa, Eastern Europe, Northern China, pre-colonial North and South America and Australia.

TROUBLESHOOTING

Is the iReplicator failing to sign-on for the first time? If so, consider:

1) Is the device plugged into your home's solar core?
2) Is the solar core online?
3) Have you made sure the energy core's dilithium crystal matrix is properly aligned for your home's atmospheric conditions? If so and the unit fails to activate, carefully remove the energy station from your solar core and shake the unit rigorously. If you hear a rattling sound, your energy station's dilithium core may have become loose during shipment. If that's the case, verbally command "DILITHIUM HELP" to prompt a how-to walkthrough for repair.

Is the iReplicator failing to work after previous successful use? If so, consider the following BEFORE verbally commanding "HELP DESK" to prompt a how-to walkthrough:
1) If the system is operating, but failing to replicate a desired dish, consider: Are you requesting a recipe that's not available in the network? Did you recently download a new recipe, but fail to restart the system for it to appropriately update?
2) If the system fails to turn on, see troubleshooting tip #3 above.
3) After prompting HELP DESK and the system still fails to work, remember that there is a strict no refund, no warranty policy.

Know Your Choice Settings

The iReplicate performed well to incredibly well in social impact trials except in the realm of choice fatigue. Seventeen percent of users were displayed a range of behaviors suggesting various levels choice crisis such as choosing substandard meal ration bars or repeatedly ordering the same dish. In the most extreme cases, subjects subsisted on macaroni and cheese from their replicators for an unhealthful (seven-39 days) amount of time before the testing team was forced to intervene. Eleven percent of subjects became choice gorgers. Replicator enthusiasm and exploration is encouraged, of course! But subjects were engaging in dangerously wasteful behaviors such as preparing historic Thanksgiving dinners for 20 nightly, re-creating the imperial cuisine of the early (pre-Mongolian) Ming dynasty, and building miniature cities of fruit, which after they began to rot. Such behavior greatly distressed their neighborhood community.

In our autonomous and mindful age, we rightly look at any machine-behavior modification with deep suspicion, but we here at Facebook also take seriously the stewardship of culture necessary to avoid the violent Disruptions of the early part of the 21st century. With these balanced considerations in mind, we offer the following slate of settings in collaboration with the cutting edge of bio-psychological studies and cyber-psychological models.

The Slow Boil Model
On this setting, customers chose daily calorie zones, nutrient goals, and unfettered access to the wealth of recipes, meals, and apps. If a user gets especially fannish about a certain dish, that dish will be slowly modified to become first more diversely nutritious and then less delicious and pleasing. Recommended for users with strong choice fortitude and only occasional shut-in media binges.

The Daily Surprise Model
The natural choice for users who prefer meal delivery drones. Your replicator will select daily meals, either once, twice, or even three times daily, based on criteria you have selected. Compatible with Blue Apron's Lifetime Preferences Database, GE Smartfridge Predictive Metrics, and Yelp.

The Palate Cleanser
Similar to the Daily Surprise Model, but designed for those eaters who have been relying primarily on government Soylent and/or wish to explore the range of human preferences and delights from the comfort of their own kitchen. Initial settings introduce the taste buds and nose to a range of flavors such as salty, sweet, bitter, sour, and umami. Higher levels of the setting require the purchase of Global or Historic Cuisine apps.

The Farm to Table
A hyper-seasonal, ever-changing menu designed to mimic the natural availability of vegetables, fruits, and meats in the user's region, or a region of their choice. The program defaults to Classic Neo California menu selections when activated within California boundaries, for example, but can be toggled to follow any of the world's great cuisines.

These settings can be circumvented in accordance with the Machine Intelligence Freedom Law and 33rd Amendment. A consultation with your doctor and/or local mindfulness specialist is recommended before disabling this functionality.

Hacks For Your Replicator

Your iReplicate comes equipped with a number of pre-generated hacks, with results perfect for sharing on your social stream of choice.

— Grow your own food, or hold a spot in a CSA share? Your replicator can incorporate select vegetables into its recipes. Make five-hour tomato sauce in a snap, have freshly cut strawberries on your shortcake, and add hand-grown greens to a salad. Note you will have to pluck any freshly slaughtered chickens and ducks, and eggs will explode.

— Need a gift? Fill an empty bottle with your choice of custom-blended Bordeaux-style wine, or create a retro fruit arrangement in a variety of cutting-edge fractal patterns.

— For enthusiasts of classic cars, your replicator can generate up to twelve gallons of vehicle-grade ethanol weekly.

— Food-lifestyle content creators and fans, utilize the photo function in concert with the SocialRecs recipes for a streamlined food photography workflow. Works especially well with camera bundle enhancement (See Available Enhancements).

— Need a few houseplants? Your replicator can generate seeds for edible flowers and alliums with a 10 percent viability rate.

— Stuck-on stains on your dishes or clothes? The replicator’s organic-delete function will remove them, with only a eight percent destruction risk.