Fans of classic Food Network series Good Eats already know about Alton Brown's disdain for so-called unitaskers, kitchen gadgets that waste space because they can perform only one job. Many a Good Eats episode featured Brown ranting and raving against superfluous cookware, but never like this.
In this video for The Daily Dot, the culinary television personality shares his thoughts on devices such as a strawberry slicer, all-edge brownie pan, and breakfast sandwich press. These are all unnecessary items that Brown justifiably shreds, but the real treat is is take on the Rollie, the bizarre contraption that produces tubes of cooked eggs. After waiting 17 minutes for his eggs to cook — that's enough time to fry up breakfast for a houseful of guests — Brown takes pity on the poor Rollie and combats a negative Amazon reviewer who calls the gadget "sensitive."
"You're expected to perform like this in front of people over and over again at the breakfast table, of course you're going to be sensitive. Come on, America."
Despite his tender words, Brown declines to taste the weird egg tube. It seems unlikely that dish will make it in his forthcoming cookbook.