Human lava lamp and slinger of donkey sauce Guy Fieri chatted with Washington City Paper about everything from his favorite Washington, DC area restaurants (spoiler: they are all featured on his show Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives) to his pizza ovens (he owns three). During the interview Fieri reiterates his intense love for kale, and most importantly, reveals the secrets behind his famous hair style. Below, the 10 best lines:
1) On his preferred oven type: "I have three wood-fired ovens... I have one at my house, one at my ranch, one on the trailer that I use for charity events."
2) On why he has no immediate plans to open in DC: "[DC has] a lot of great concepts, a lot of great chefs out there. José Andrés. You guys are stacked. You've got enough."
3) Oh how real the TV version of Guy Fieri is: "That's 100 percent me. I'm not an actor. Lord knows, I'd be acting if I were an actor. What you see is what you get."
4) On Food Network hating his fashion sense: "And they said, 'Well, you know, you can't wear those shorts.' And I said, 'Who said I can't wear shorts?'... It just naturally evolved that it just was going to be the way I was going to be... What you see is what you get, girl."
5) On grocery shopping: "I am the worst at the grocery store. It turns into three carts. It turns into, 'Oh did you see the truffle cheese? We've got to get the truffle cheese!'"
6) On the secret contents of his pantry: "Farro and quinoa, I've got bags of them — if you name it I've got it — in my pantry."
7) On his hair styling routine: "I tell ya, people want to think that I spend a bunch of time on it and there's a whole thing. Nope. I just kind of get up, sometimes it will be in a faux-hawk if I slept on both sides of my head... and sometimes it will be flat. There's no regimen."
8) The secret to his legendary coif: "Wax. I think it takes fives seconds to get it ready. Just I put the wax in my hair and I rub my hands in it, and there you go!"
9) On the future of his legendary coif: "I'm going to change it up in the next few years. I'm going to do dreadlocks."
10) On why he won't launch a hair product line: "I don't think that they need any products from me. Not that I even know what products there are. I've been using the same hair wax for as long as I can remember. I'm not a gel guy, I'm not a perfume guy, not really into any of that."