In December, animatronic bobble head Guy Fieri opened the first location of Guy Fieri on Campus at Montclair State University in New Jersey — more than 15 are planned — and Record restaurant critic Elisa Ung was brave enough to try it. Spoiler alert: she did not enjoy the industrialized and gloppy thunder that only a collaboration between French multinational Sodexo and Guy Fieri could create in an institutional dining facility at a state university.
Guy Fieri on Campus is located in a residence hall cafeteria next to a Dunkin' Donuts, and according to the fearless Ung, "anyone can drop in and get a taste of Fieri without having to venture to his famously maligned Times Square restaurant." What did she find after courageously "sampling all of the dishes labeled as signature items"? A "distressing" taco with "chunks of chicken so hard and dry they were practically choking hazards." A "quite dry" hamburger. Mac and cheese with a "processed flavor." And Fieri's now-legendary calling card: "[E]verything was coated in a nauseating amount of the trademark Fieri 'donkey sauce.'"
Ung follows Pete Wells' approach to his review and asks herself a question: "Would I eat here again without being ravenous and unable to obtain any other kind of food?" She answers bluntly, "No."