Back Alley Waffles — a Washington, DC waffle shop located in an alley — has closed indefinitely and is blaming the shutter on Groupon's "bloodthirsty business practices." The three-month-old waffle shop has posted a screed online explaining:
Grouponistas, sorry, but I'd rather have my hand slammed in a car door than honor your Groupon coupons. You'll have to seek refunds from your new insect overlords. If you act quickly, you should get your money back by Christmas. 2015.
It seems Back Alley Waffles signed on for a two-for-one deal and learned a few lessons about how online deal sites work. Namely, that payment is not immediate, but rather "[t]he business has to wait for most of the remainder of its money until two months after laying out the cost of the food and labor. And for some of the money, it will be three months after honoring the customer's Groupon coupon in the shop before the business is paid for that customer."
A Groupon spokesperson, meanwhile, denies the site's involvement in the shutter, telling the Washington Post, "According to our records, only 132 Groupons, or 18% sold, have been redeemed since Back Alley ran two months ago, and Mr. Nels[e]n has received 2/3 of his share of the revenue to date. We always hate to hear that a local business has decided to close, but the math does not point to Groupon as the cause."
Anyway, to recoup their money, Back Alley Waffles is now offering waffles for $450. By appointment only. Those had better some very good waffles.