SF Restaurant Seeks 'Irate & Miserable Cook' on Craigslist

Here's a fun one from the annals of Craiglist: a fake search is underway in San Francisco for a cook who is just miserable enough for the job. In what appears to be a disgruntled employee's swipe at a colleague at an unnamed restaurant, this ad declares it is seeking cooks who "believe that the best way to express one's passion for food is through screaming and vitriol" — you know, as seen on TV. This prospective chef must also show contempt for coworkers, believe him or herself to be better at running a business than the management team and have an "awareness that chefs are the only people in the world that have stressful and dangerous jobs, which naturally empowers them to be outright dickish."

Yikes. So say one meets those requirements? The ad declares, "Congratulations! We (and 90% of the world's restaurants) have just the role for you, so long as you at first exhibit what appears to be pride in your skills, then devolves into arrogance, then an unwillingness to learn anything from anyone, and finally a slow revealing of the above traits." Oh, but it's not as simple as that. Compensation for an "irate & miserable cook" is evidently, "Just shy of enough to dispel your scorn." Here's the full text of the ad.

Do you believe that the best way to express one's passion for food is through screaming and vitriol? Have you seen more than your share of sensationalized chef TV shows that support this theory?

Do you have what it takes to be endlessly ornery and overtly contemptuous when dealing with co-workers? Can you show equal condescension for the idiotic questions from Front of House and Back of House colleagues?

Is your aspiration to be a chef due to your awareness that chefs are the only people in the world that have stressful and dangerous jobs, which naturally empowers them to be outright dickish?

Are you prepared to quietly believe that you know how to run the business better than management, and then not so quietly undermine their decisions and thus the direction of the company?

Congratulations! We (and 90% of the world's restaurants) have just the role for you, so long as you at first exhibit what appears to be pride in your skills, then devolves into arrogance, then an unwillingness to learn anything from anyone, and finally a slow revealing of the above traits.

Other (less qualified) cooks are welcome to apply with us as well, in the event that roles come available not requiring the years of study in recalcitrance.

· Irate & Miserable Cook Wanted [Craigslist via ISSF]
· All Craigslist Coverage on Eater [-E-]