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Heartland Episode of No Reservations: Just the One-Liners

Chef Brian Polcyn and Bourdain talk charcuterie.
Chef Brian Polcyn and Bourdain talk charcuterie.
Photo: Travel Channel

This is an odd little episode, filled with clips of towns Bourdain passes through on tour, seemingly extra bits randomly thrown together to create a semblance of a full episode. That's not to say the food's not worth noticing, however; from experimental small plates in Minneapolis to food trucks in Austin, game sausage in Denver to authentic and fresh Japanese in Columbus, this episode is out to prove that there are hard-working chefs doing interesting things far from either coast. On to the Quotable Bourdain — feel free to add your picks in the comments below.

1) On mold: "It's like bringing Paris Hilton to a party: pretty soon everybody's got what she's got."
2) On Columbus, Ohio: "Even in Ohio, people give you a quizzical look when you say you ate really, really well in Columbus, like you're about to drop the punchline or something."

3) On American sushi habits: "Just don't put any wasabi in the soy sauce, you'll be dead to the man."
4) On his next life as a sushi chef: "See, if I could come back as somebody else, I could do this during the day, and at night I could play bass like Bootsy Collins."
5) On seafood: "It's about finding the best and then not fucking it up."
6) On velvet-rope type clubs: "The cornerstone of the shit-based economy is, in fact, bottle service."
7) On his delight at discovering rabbit belly: "I am lower than whale shit. This is street food in Austin?"
8) On panko-breaded, deep fried hotdogs at East Side King in Austin: "Come, all ye hipsters, with your mutant mash-up food, your strange and wondrous treats, to my neighborhood. And soon."
9) On a bone marrow dish covered in shaved fresh black truffles: "Who would not love this? Maybe a hardened communist would not love this. If you were looking to recruit Cuban baseball players, this would be like the perfect thing."

· All No Reservations coverage on Eater National [-E-]