Former New York Times critic and current staff writer Frank Bruni writes a column called The Tipsy Diaries, about "New York's drinking life." And with that comes the dangerous turf of also sampling the much-reported and demonized Four Loko, the sugary and flavored malt liquor with bonus hits of caffeine. AKA "Blackout in a can." Did he volunteer or was he assigned? What cruel, cruel editors at the Times.
Calling it "malt liquor in confectionary drag," he writes that it serves "as the clearest possible reminder that many drinkers aren't seeking any particular culinary or aesthetic enjoyment." Brave man that he is, he knocked back three different varieties — lemonade, cranberry lemonade, and watermelon — but alas, he missed the all-important Blue Raspberry. As an end result, he reported that he "felt a slight flush in my cheeks and subtle tingling on my scalp." Times staffers are concerned, however: he hasn't been heard from since.